At least that's how it is for me. As I struggle with adapting to the new realities of our family I find that it only magnifies the discomfort I feel when it comes to one's faith. Part of me suspects that's also because adding a new family member into your life also brings other family members back into your orbit for awhile and with that comes all sorts of baggage. It comes up with my in-laws, my parents, and my college roommate to name a few. I'm not very good at hiding my discomfort so when someone mentions something like my mother-in-law did about visiting the creation museum I have a hard time keeping my thoughts to myself. With my mother-in-law it was a resounding "no thank you!"
I know this leaves them with some confusion and probably a degree of discomfort of their own. From their perspective "The Truth" has already been decided and locked down centuries ago. It's objective, concrete, and all located within the pages of their Bible which is treated very much like an encyclopedia. If you want to know how the world began and we came to be just turn to the very beginning of the Bible. The pages there say that it happened in seven days and in a particular order. Anything that says anything contrary to that is clearly wrong and so why not create a museum to defend that and even further why wouldn't you want to take your family to visit?
The thing is, the longer I follow this road that I am on the less certain I become of "The Truth." To me it seems a bit foolish to assume that I have all the answers nailed down. A bit limiting to assume that any God worth worshiping or following can be summed up neatly by the words I have at my disposal. If I can describe him accurately with my finite language doesn't that in some way make him a bit finite as well? As for the Bible...isn't it a collection of different forms of writing which makes it wholly inappropriate to treat it simply as a work of non-fiction, capable of being searched as if each item is capable of standing entirely unto itself?
I suppose that's why when it comes to writers I'm more drawn to the people who are less likely to assert "The Truth" and more like to say "I don't know" or "This is what I think." To me that seems like a whole lot more genuine and accurate way to describe life and truth. I've appreciated people like Frank Schaeffer
and Barbara Brown Taylor
for that very reason, even more so because to a certain degree both have been in some fashion where I've been as well.
The church we've been attending for the last few months - irregularly at best, but in some way that's what fits the most right now - is going to be using Barbara Brown Taylor's book "An Altar in the World: Finding the Sacred Beneath Our Feet" as the guideposts to follow during Lent. I read the book last year, but I'm looking forward to doing so again. I'm hoping that it will help me gain a better perspective on the way things are and bring a bit of clarity into that which challenges my sense of direction. I'm planning on sharing my journey through the book as we the season of Lent and continue through it because I hope there will be greater opportunity to reflect on it if I also have to put a few words down as well. I'm hoping that will give me a bit more clarity. Perhaps my words and journey will be helpful for you as well.
As I'm writing this on Saturday my house looks like a toy explosion went off, Hubby went into work early (shortly after I was able to poke him out of bed), and I have a large headache which is only exacerbated by the crying and screaming so present in a house with a spirited two year old and infant. I think I could use a few moments of silence, but instead I'm going to try and focus on this passage starting on page 6:
The problem is, many of the people in need of saving are in churches, and at least part of what they need saving from is the idea that God sees the world the same way they do. What if the gravel of a parking lot looks as promising to God as the floorboards of a church? What if a lost soul strikes God as more reachable than a lifelong believer? What if God can drop a ladder absolutely anywhere, with no regard for the religious standards developed by those who have made it their business to know the way to God?
I could not possibly say.
An apt set of questions I think for a chapter entitled "The Practice of Waking Up to God."
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